I’m keeping it short today to write down this insane idea my boss told me about just now.
I went to her office for work things but of course things turned personal and hit close to home in a matter of minutes. I have a good relationship with my boss, which I’m grateful for. She’s aware and doesn’t judge me for my mental illness. So when I have to leave almost 3 times a month for some kind of doctor appointment she’s always been understanding.
What gravitates me to her, what I really admire about her, is her sense of self worth. I’ll always remember something she said to me last year, “once you know your worth no one can hurt you”.
Who am I to have worth? Who am I to not blame myself whenever something goes wrong? There’s always something I could have done. Should have done.
Today she shared a personal story with me, involving someone hurting her emotionally and her feeling “broken” after. So relatable, I thought. Who hasn’t gone through something like that? Isn’t that the normal reaction to something like heartbreak?
She crashed my train of thought. Not derailed, not a sudden halt. That train is demolished. It’s not running anytime soon. The parts for it are backordered. Find another way. She told me after that experience, she decided to be in control of her emotions that way no one could break her again. Because of her self worth, no one can hurt her.
First of all, HOW. How can someone feel entitled to self worth? I’ve always seen it as selfish. But here, it sounds healing. Like a source of good. Imagine how different the world would be if everyone felt that way